Many men tend to rush into foreplay because they want to start having sex as soon as possible. Now, as a sexologist, I get to talk to a lot of women about sexuality. Most women keep telling me that they want much sexier and more sensual foreplay. So I’ve put together a simple guide with some of my best tips and positions for foreplay.

The first foreplay tip is very easy. Just slow down what you’re doing. Try this. The next time you make love, in any foreplay position, touch your lover from the legs, from the body to the head. Now do this simple foreplay massage motion slowly and very gently. Sometimes I just touch the fine hairs and nothing else. Most find this type of slow, light movement very erotic and sexy. Repeat this movement several times and see how your partner reacts.

I generally do not touch the genital area or breasts at the beginning of foreplay. Save these hot spots for later when your lover is more aroused.

There is an art to touching your lover in a foreplay position. The more your attention is devoted to the sensations in your hands and the more you enjoy the touch, the more your lover will feel it and respond as well.

Try a simple exercise and communicate this to your lover. Touch your partner for a few minutes and think about work. Now play for the next minute with as much attention on your hands as possible. Ask for feedback on how the touch felt. One could do this foreplay position on a massage table as well.

Most women in particular are very sensitive and love a man who is very present in their touch. This allows them to feel more and open up more as well.

My second tip for foreplay is to simply take double the normal amount of time that you normally would. Most women love foreplay that goes on and on. Some even like foreplay more than intercourse. If you’re following the tips above about being totally present in your hands, every touch is very pleasurable and can go on for years.

The last foreplay tip is to have no goals. Most men are too focused on the goal of intercourse and orgasm. They miss out on the great pleasure and connection that great foreplay can bring.

Erotic massage and G-spot massage are one of the best ways in foreplay to allow your lover to be more orgasmic. I cover detailed penis and vulvar massage tips in my free newsletter.

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